Sunday, September 27, 2009

Broken and Restored!

This morning, our pastor spoke on the topic of broken families. He briefly spoke on how to keep your family from being broken but he spent the majority of time talking about how much God loves and cares for the broken. Psalm 68:5 says, "A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling." Our pastor encouraged us to be a blessing and to love and care for the broken as God does. The pastor spoke about a young girl whose parents had divorced and she struggles with the feelings of failures to this day. During the message, my head bowed and I found tears coming to my eyes because once upon a time I was that little girl. I realized that I don't share the hope and promises that God gave me long ago because I don't like to share that part of my life. I like the picture now much better. I feel convicted to share a bit of my past because I want to give God the praise of how He loved me when I was broken and hope for those who are broken now.

My Mother was 16 when I was born and my Dad 20. They were unmarried when they found out she was pregnant. My Mom tried to abort me but kept me only because My Dad proposed marriage to her. My Mother came from one of the darkest, ugliest, abusive families I have ever heard of and my Dad came from a home with an abusive and alcoholic father, although he became a Christian late in life and was one of my most beloved people of all time. These two young people were married and had me and my sister. Without Jesus though and no knowledge of good relationships, they were doomed to fail. When I was 4 my Mother left to live with a drug dealer. As a Kindergartner I spent 4 days with my Dad and my soon to be step-mother and 3 days with my Mother. On the day my Dad got re-married, my Mom, sister and I left for Oregon to live. The year to come was one of the darkest periods in my life. So much so that I remember very little of it. After that year, I refused to go back to Oregon ( I was strong-willed at 7 too!) and that started 8 years of court battles. My sister was sent to live with our Mom and I with my Dad. We spent summers together and split them between homes. I had times of great good but the majority of time was ugly. My Dad's parents were a mainstay in my life and my Grams took me every Sunday to church, even though it was a Mormon church, I learned early that church was a place of safety and haven.

My teen years were a rough road as I was strong willed, lacking in a strong foundation from childhood combined with parents that had no idea what to do with me. My Dad and Step-Mom had come to Christ but we lived in a place without much support and discipling for very young parents and young Christians. I came to Christ at 13 and during a particularly rough patch, God gave me this verse, "I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten..." Joel 2:25. I clung to this promise, that God someday would make it better, sooner rather than later preferably, but that was not to be. My teen years were extremely rocky ones as were my early 20's. Any growth and stability I had were hard fought.

I have had to make some hard decisions and some hard choices but God has never left me and I am now living in the redeemed years. I feel that God is re-paying me now for those years that locusts have eaten and that is what I want to share with those who are currently living in the rough, broken years. I want to share with those parents whose children are having to live those years now, through no fault of their own, that God can redeem their lives. They can have happy, joyful lives full of God's blessings. We as parents or grandparents in my case, just need to keep showing our kids the way to God. Teaching them how to make the right decisions based on God's word and God will repay the years the locusts have eaten. I know because I am living proof.

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  1. God has proven Himself so faithful...tears in my eyes...I am so amazed at how we, in our own generation, can see the bonds of sin and death broken...evidenced in the faces of our children. May our children and grandchildren be richly blessed; full of mercy, love and truth, instruments of His grace.

  2. Wow, what a great story. Thanks for sharing and testifying how faithful God is.


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